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Giants-Seahawks ‘Kudos & Wet Willies’ review: Embarrassing, from the top down

The Giants appear broken

Seattle Seahwaks v New York Giants
Devon Witherspoon of Seattle finishes a 97-yard interception return for a touchdown on Monday.
Photo by Kathryn Riley/Getty Images

The New York Giants offered a national television audience yet another miserable performance on Monday in a 24-3 loss to a Seattle Seahawks’ team that tried desperately to help the Giants stay in the game. The Giants refused. Let’s review in our traditional ‘Kudos & Wet Willies’ style.

Kudos to ...

Kayvon Thibodeaux — Thibodeaux had a sack and nearly had a pick-six when it still mattered, reading a screen pass and getting his hands on the ball but not quite being able to reel it in. Thibodeaux finished with two sacks, two tackles for loss and a pair of quarterback hits. He also had the good sense not to celebrate after his second sack, which came late in the game with the outcome long decided.

Wan’Dale Robinson — The second-year wide receiver had five receptions for 40 yards and a run for 7 yards. He looked like a weapon.

Matt Breida — Had five receptions for 48 yards, including a pair of 22-yard catches. Those were the Giants’ two longest plays of the game. Breida had only 30 yards on 14 carries, but he at least made a couple of plays as a receiver.

Graham Gano — It is sort of sad when the placekicker is a team’s best player. That, though, might be the case with Gano. He made a 55-yard field goal Monday night for the Giants’ only points.

Wet Willies to ...

Coaching — I have used a lot of words in recent days to defend the Giants’ coaching staff, while acknowledging that there have been things that deserve to be questioned. I can’t defend them after Monday night.

Brian Daboll can flip all the tablets in frustration that he wants, but this Giants team has not looked remotely ready to play at any time this season. That’s on Daboll and his coaching staff.

The Giants have been outscored 77-9 in the first halves of their four games. That’s ridiculous. They looked undisciplined with eight accepted penalties, and perhaps a couple others they were fortunate were not called. The special teams were abominable.

The offense looks lost. The offensive line is awful, but beyond that the Giants’ offense seems broken. For the second time in four games on Monday, the Giants ran the ball well on their first possession and thereafter chose to ignore even trying to run. In the other two games, they ignored the run from the beginning.

After a summer filled with promise, players like Darren Waller and Jalin Hyatt look like afterthoughts in whatever the offensive plan might be. Yes, Saquon Barkley is injured but the ineptitude has been stunning.

“The offense is just not good enough in all facets. I don’t even have anything to really say. It’s just not good enough,” said a bewildered Waller. “I don’t know, man. I really don’t. I see the talent; I see the guys that we’ve got and I see the type of vision that we were able to have coming from the spring and the excitement that we had on offense and I just don’t know. I don’t have a lot of words right now. I’m sorry.”

Daboll won Coach of the Year honors after last season and his coaching staff was looked at as outstanding one. Right now, Daboll and Co. don’t appear to have any answers, either.

Special teams (with an exemption for Graham Gano) — Six accepted penalties, with a seventh declined because there were two penalties on one play. A muffed punt by Eric Gray, leading to Adoree’ Jackson (yikes!!) returning punts. There was no chance of Jackson getting hurt, though. When he wasn’t fair-catching the ball, he was letting it bounce and roll another 15-20 yards. A 23-yard punt return allowed, which was — of course — added to by a penalty.

Gano’s continued excellence, with a 55-yard field goal, was a bright spot. Awful play from this group, though, has become the norm.

Offensive line — Yeesh! It was like the Giants were playing six on 11 Monday night. They might as well have kept their offensive linemen on the sideline for all the good they did against the Seahawks.

Seattle’s defense entered the game with five sacks. The Seahawks left with 16 after sacking Daniel Jones 10 times and being credited with a sack of Parris Campbell for good measure. Jones was hit 14 times, and that doesn’t count the times he escape the pocket and ran for positive yardage.

“As horrible as this feels you’ve got to get up and go to work in the morning,” said right tackle Evan Neal. “We’re all we’ve got. That’s all we need.”

Maybe not. It would certainly be nice to have Andrew Thomas, who has missed three games with a hamstring injury, back in the lineup. I think, though, it will take more than Thomas to fix this mess.

Daniel Jones — Yes, Jones was sacked/hit/harassed about a gazillion times Monday night. No, considering all of that pressure and the Giants apparent refusal to attempt to establish and stick with a real running game, he has no chance to lead a functional offense.

Jones, though, has to be better than he was against the Seahawks.

The quarterback took a couple of sacks he did not need to take, holding ... and holding ... and holding the ball rather than at least throwing it away. He threw two bad interceptions. The pick-six was an awful, back-breaking play. The stumbling, bumbling Giants could actually have pulled within four points in the third quarter, but Devon Witherspoon’s 97-yard interception return sealed their fate.

Jones not only appeared to be off target with his attempted throw to Parris Campbell, he appeared to not see an open Waller in the end zone for a likely touchdown. Which led to this:

Jones’ second interception was one where he was indecisive, double-clutching and eventually throwing a horrid pass nowhere in the vicinity of a Giants receiver.

Jones fumbled twice, with the first quarter strip sack by Mario Edwards deep in Giants’ territory bringing back memories of Jones’ early-career struggles with ball protection. The quarterback, under duress — of course — did not protect the ball as he tried to get out of the pocket and Seattle’s Mario Edwards chopped it out.

Arik Armstead — This is a digression, but it’s disgusting. There is no need for NFL players to make fun of other NFL players in this manner. It’s classless.