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‘Kudos & Wet Willies:’ Giants destroyed by the faux 49ers edition

Let’s break it down

San Francisco 49ers v New York Giants Photo by Elsa/Getty Images

i know you’re just dyng to read the ‘Kudos & Wet Willies” from Sunday’s New York Giants blowout loxs to the San Francisco 49ers. So, let’s not waste time. Here we go.

Kudos to ...

Daniel Jones’ running — Five carries, 49 yards and one carry for a big gain nullified by penalty. At least something worked well for the Giants on Sunday.

Blake Martinez — Nine tackles, a sack, two tackles for loss, a quarterback hit and a completely honest “it’s not good enough” response when asked Sunday about being 0-3.

Graham Gano — Three of three on field-goal attempts for all of the Giants’ points, including kicks of 52 and 47 yards.

B.J. Hill’s helmet — That helmet saved the Giants a touchdown in the first quarter when it flew off Hill’s head and earned an ‘illegal hands to the face’ penalty on the 49ers that nullified a Jerick McKinnon touchdown catch. ‘Kudos’ to Chris for suggesting this one.

James Bradberry — He gave up a few completions to Kendrick Bourne, but Bradberry had a trio of pass breakups. Don’t blame the signings of Bradberry and Martinez for the Giants’ defensive struggles.

Wet Willies to ...

Everything about the offense except Jones’ running — Three turnovers. Only 13 first downs. Only 20:16 worth of possession to 39:44 for San Francisco. Only 17 yards on 10 carries by running backs.

Third-down defense — San Francisco converted 8 of 12 third-down opportunities. Six of those conversions were third-and-long. You just can’t win that way.

Giants’ kickoff returnCorey Ballentine tried, but there was no place to go. Ballentine averaged 17.3 yards on three returns, and didn’t get any of them out to the 20-yard line.

Overall defense — The 49ers held the ball for 39:44. San Francisco missed a field goal and had the clock run out to end the game on their final possession. The 49ers scored on their other seven possessions.

Cliches from losing coaches — Joe Judge used all of these on Sunday.

“I’ve gotta watch the tape.”

“We go back to work.”

“We all have to do our job better.”

“Our guys played hard.”

“We’re going to work our butts off and get this thing right.”

Saying you’re close when you’re notLeonard Williams tried to sell that narrative Sunday evening. Sorry, Leonard, not buying.

New York Football — The Jets lost to the Indianapolis Colts, 36-7, on Sunday. That means New York teams lost by a combined score of 72-16. Oh, and they are a combined 0-6.

The 5 BBV dummies who picked the Giants to win Sunday — What in the world were we thinking?