So I'm working the late shift at BBV headquarters over the weekend, and an email comes in over the big Commodore 64 Super Computer we use here to bring you all the latest Giants news. Since it's already been a busy weekend for the Giants free-agent wise, I figure this is another big signing coming over the wire. But no, it's our old buddy, "Dave from Asheville" checking in with some more of his keen insight on the Football Giants. You may remember Dave from his frequent correspondence with "Mosley's Mailbag" on ESPN.com, which we featured last month with our Dave from Asheville Retrospective
So here is the email from Dave:
From: DaveFromAsheville@notaclue.com
Sent: Saturday, February 28th, 2009 11:05 PM
Subject: What the hell are they doing?
Dear Jim,
So the Giants basically spent a stimulus package this weekend on defensive players, what the hell are they thinking? Might as well just go buy three long snappers with all that money, it's not like defense wins championships. I mean, what's up with these guys they signed? Let's break it down, Asheville style
Chris Canty: Great, we sign a guy whose last name is "can't", as in "Can't he" sack the QB, just once, or "Can't he" be 5 minutes early for meetings?
Michael Boley: Went to college at Southern Miss, as in "I'll miss this tackle", "I'll miss that tackle", and "the Giants will miss the playoffs".
Rocky Bernard: This one I don't get. How can you sign a movie character to a free agent contract? I mean sure, the guy looked good against Mr. T and that Russian dude, but, I mean, he isn't real! Why not sign Roger Rabbit and Benjamin Button too?
When are the Maras going to wake up and realize Jerry Reese has no idea what he is doing?
I'll bet my Sean Bennett jersey none of these players ever amounts to anything.
Keep in touch, and tell Ed I am still waiting for his reply on my "500 Things I Would Fix About the Giants" article.
Yours,
Dave from Asheville
We're still going over that list Dave, I'm just not sure "Retiring Danny Kanell's Number" and "Hiring Mike Brown from the Bengals to run the organization" are ideas that will work.