Your official 2011 Giants jersey buyer guide

Stole this idea from JimmyK, and its awesome. Enjoy!







Steve Weatherford

Directional kicking is the "in" thing in today's football fashion.

It's a punter.


Matt Dodge

Awesome if you are an Eagles fan

Terrible if you are a Giants fan


David Carr

Just a divine amount of talent

You might pee yourself if you see a large fellow coming at you. Sack fever.


Lawrence Tynes

Lawrence "NY" Times!

It's our kicker.


Eli Manning

Get the most bang for your buck. Will be the longest tenured Giant and probably most acclaimed.

You aren't very creative, are you? Won't ever give us another shout at the superblow.


Jerrel Jernigan

Promising rookie that has a real chance of making some noise as the #3 WR and ST beast.

People might mistake your jersey for a traitor's.


Ramses Barden

The Pharaoh. Not to mention, you have the jersey of one of the most realistic Keyshawn Johnson look-alikes I've ever seen.  

Lets see him actually get on the field.


Devin Thomas

If he pans out, you can piss off the Redskins fans.

Don't even know if he makes the team.


Sage Rosenfels

Jewish Hall of Famer!

The Rosencopter


Prince Amukamara

What's not to like? Awesome name...1st rounder...oozing potential and beastliness.

He's got that broken yeah....


Kenny Phillips

Hard hitting safety that should elevate his game to a probowl level.

He's going to be a free agent soon. Also, could be haunted with Tiki Barber's douchebaggery


Corey Webster

Our best corner. A true baller.

23 is a prime number. Screw prime numbers.


Terrell Thomas

Awesome corner. A true baller. Also somewhat of a twitter thug. Respect.

Had a down year last year, and is a free agent. Let's hope he doesn't leave.


Antrel Rolle

Anybody else think "Rolle" is a really cool name to have on the back o' the jersey. Also, a highlight reel type player

He's had diarrhea of the mouth before. A few comments could make you look like a real jackass


Brandon Jacobs

Big and angry.

Flying helmets.


Danny Ware

Could be our 3rd back...definitely has shown flashes

Might not be our 3rd back. Also, DJ or Danny? Please make up your mind.


Aaron Ross

Former No.1 pick that has something to prove. Could blow up this year.

Careful putting it might pull a hammy.


Da'Rel Scott

Speed. Holy crap, he has it.

Injuries. Holy crap, he could have it.


Andre Brown

Speed and Power. Could be the Derrick Ward we've been looking for.

All he's been is a gigantic tease. Buyer Beware.


Tyler Sash

Could see a ton of playing time as early as this year. Tearing it up in camp and could take over Deon Grant's role.

Jerry Reese drafted him, so anybody who buys this is ticketed for a blimp ride.


Ahmad Bradshaw

The dude is quick as hell and definitely a fighter. Plus he's locked up for awhile.

You have to figure your butterfingers will spill a lot on this jersey.


Henry Hynoski

The Hynoceros. Is there any description needed?

There are no cons to buying this jersey.


Travis Beckum

Athletic TE that could step up and be a force with Kevin Boss now gone.

Unproven, and you'd scare off any fans wearing Eli jerseys because you can't block worth a damn.


Zak DeOssie

The best at what he does in the NFL.

Unfortunately, he's a long snapper.


Clint Sintim

Could end up starting as one of our vaunted LBzez.

Figure to have a lot of unmet expectations when wearing this jersey.  Even if your jersey is brand new.


Greg Jones

All American in college. Is an LB. 'Nuff said.

Just hype, no proof...yet.


Jonathon Goff

Run stuffing monster. Starting MIKE.

Really, really unsexy name. Goff? Ew.


Phillip Dillard

Lots of potential. Could get the starting nod if Goff gets injured.

Cue "Dullard" jokes.


Mark Herzlich

If he makes the team, one of the best feel good stories in a long time.

If he makes the team....


Michael Boley

Starting linebacker. We love LBzez!

People might consider your fashion sense average...possibly mediocre.


Mitch Petrus

Great for people that are meatheads

You'd be oxymoronic if you wore this and didn't hit gym.


David Baas

It's pronounced "Boss." Any questions?

Love the dude, but he's a C.


William Beatty

New LT and fashionista.

Have yet to see how successful he can be.


David Diehl

"Diehl" just sounds like a football name. Surprised more "Dave Diesel" nicknames haven't showed up.

The "Diesel" is running out of gas. Especially at LT.


Kareem McKenzie

Best right tackle in the game.

Got to wonder when he's going to hang 'em up.


Osi Umenyiora

One of the Giant greats as a pass rusher. He is simply a beast.

Yes, Osi. There has to be a "cons" section. Will you stop bitching about it, please?


Chris Snee

All-Pro. Also, you'll get brownie point from Coach Coughlin.

One of my favorites, but he's at a real "not sexy" position. I like sexy.


Kevin Boothe

Back dat ass up!

Back dat ass up!


Stacey Andrews

If we cut him and bring Shawn back, you'll still be OK!

Do I really need to go over this?


Victor Cruz


Could be a Sinorice Moss redux. Just don't know yet.


Darius Reynaud

Having a monstrous camp. Could be the #3

Might make people angry when they see your jersey, compliment you on buying a Toomer, and then being sorely disappointed.


Mario Manningham

Poised for a breakout year and superstardom. Super Mario's contract year should be something to behold.

Put it on, and it'll be tough for you to find the Meadowlands stadium. Chances are you end up a few miles short.


Bear Pascoe

The dude's name is Bear

Unfortunately, all the jersey says is "Pascoe". Jeez, what a let down.


Hakeem Nicks

Hakeem the Dream. OptiNicks Prime. Just a bonafide superstar.

Another one of Reese's draft picks, so blimp ride for you and your disgustingly large hands.


Jason Pierre-Paul

An angry young player poised to become the next inheritor of the vaunted Giants pass rush.

Bust written all over him. Too raw. 4.5 sacks in 8 games. I expected at least 15. Garbage.


Justin Tuck

The consummate leader and dangerous pass rusher. Monstrously powerful, both physically and in terms of class.

Like Eli, your creativity needs to be questioned if you pick him.


Mathias Kiwanuka

Yet another top notch pass rusher.

Your nickname is a fruit.


Rocky Bernard

Great descriptor if you're fat.

Poor descriptor if you're not.


Marvin Austin

He took some free stuff. I'm okay with that.

He took some free stuff. He didn't share with me.


Linval Joseph

See: Rocky Bernard description. Time for him to step up and be a beast.

Nobody knows how he'll fare just yet.


Chris Canty

Pretty sure he borrowed Shredder's mask for his helmet.

If you like green, be it ninja turtles or the Philadelphia Eagles...he'll massacre you.

FanPosts are written by community members. This is simply a way for community members to express opinions too long to be contained in a comment.

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