They're Still Whining In Florida

Folks in warm, sunny Florida still can't believe it. They can't believe the stupid, ignorant, cold-weather, snow-loving NFL owners had the audacity to take the 2014 Super Bowl away from them and give it to New York.

The nerve! Just listen to the poor babies.

"How could they trade picture-perfect weather for freezing cold and snow?" a befuddled Octavio Cruz wondered Wednesday in Miami. "The fans and the players love it here."

Further north in sunny Tampa, real estate investor George Meyer agreed.

"It's bad for the players and it's bad for the fans," he said. "It will affect the game in ways that have nothing to do with the game, and nothing to do with the players."

Tampa and Miami were the losing bidders in Tuesday's selection of the $1.6 billion Giants/Jets stadium as home for the 2014 NFL title game - the first cold weather, outdoor Super Bowl.

The decision was harder to swallow in the Sunshine State than a glass of rancid orange juice.

"I think it was a conspiracy," said Cruz, a Dolphins season ticker holder. "They had Tampa and Miami running against each other, so basically they canceled out."

Tampa schoolteacher Logan Mabe thought the fix was in, too: "The NFL is based in New York, right? Let the baby have his bottle."


This is really a one-time special event. And even if it's not, you still need to be quiet. Getting the big game is not your birth right, you know.

So, just stop your complaining and re-file your bid for 2015.

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