Big Blue View: An SB Nation Community

Navigation: Jump to content areas:


Sports blogs for fans, by fans.
New Blog: World Soccer Digest for Soccer Fans!

Let's talk wide receivers, hot girls

SBaker' brought up the wide receivers and hot girls comparison in a comment thread the other day. Let's take advantage of that opening to compare the various wide receivers who could become Giants to the beautiful women they might remind you of.

Bar_refaeli_medium
Michael Crabtree is ... Bar Refaeli

Refaeli, the SI swimsuit cover girl, is the sexiest girl in the bar. But you're afraid to go talk to her because you know she's probably out of your league, anyway. And, you know you don't have what it takes to talk your way into the conversation. Same with the Giants and Crabtree.

More Bar.

Adriana_lima_medium
Jeremy Maclin is ... Adriana Lima

Mostly because I had to find a place to get Lima in here, since she is one of my favorites. But, she is married to basketball player Marko Jaric, and thus unavailable. Maclin will also likely be off the market before the Giants get a shot at him.

More Adriana.

Reby_thumb_medium
Darrius Heyward-Bey is ... Reby Sky

Lots of flash and more sizzle than you might be able to handle. But, are you really sure what you are getting yourself into? I know that's the case with Reby, our NY Giants Girl, and I suspect it's the same with DHB.

More Reby. And even more Reby.

Danica_medium
Braylon Edwards is ... Danica Patrick

Has all the physical attributes you want, looks great and has had some shining moments. But, for the most part more potential than production.

More Danica.

Jessica_alba_medium

 

Hakeem Nicks is ... Jessica Alba

Looks really nice, but at first you think you might be able to do better. Then you stop and think about it, and realize you might just be nuts to pass up the chance. You know you wouldn't complain.

More Jessica.

 

Serena_williams_medium
Anquan Boldin is ... Serena Williams

Hard-hitting, powerful and unafraid. Pretty scary once they both get rolling. Boldin likes to catch the ball, then steamroll opponents. Williams likes to steamroll opponents with that big serve and powerful forehand.

More Serena.

Gulbis_medium
Percy Harvin is ... Natalie Gulbis

Both Harvin, the wide receiver/running back and Gulbis, the LPGA star, pack a lot of excitement into small packages. Might not be your first pick, but both are sexy choices and you have to admit you wouldn't pass up the opportunity.

More Natalie.

Ivanovic_medium
Kenny Britt is ... Ana Ivanovic

We don't know a heck of a lot about Britt, other than he is from Rutgers. Nor do we know much about the tennis-playing Ivanovic. But, we sure would like to know a heckuva lot more.

More Ana.

Anna_benson_medium
Chad Johnson is ... Anna Benson

Not currently available, and you know darn well getting involved is a bad idea, anyway. But, wouldn't you love to have a fling? You know you would have fun ... for a little while.

More Anna.

 

Anna_rawson2_medium
Ramses Barden is ... Anna Rawson

They are both long, tall physical freaks. Barden the 6-foot-6 monster wide receiver, Rawson the leggy 5-10 golfer and model. You would love to get close, just to get a really good look. But, truthfully, you really have no idea if either one of them can thrive at an elite level in their respective sports.

More Anna.

We can't finish this without a Plaxico Burress comparison, since it is all the Burress issues that got us into thism anyway, So, without further adieu ...

Lohan_medium
Plaxico Burress is ... Lindsay Lohan

They both look good from far away, but when you get closer you realize neither of them is all that great to be around, both have had driving issues and seemingly aren't crazy about authority, and you are never really sure what either one will do next. And their behavior tells you they each have commitment issues.

More Lindsay.

0 recs  |  Comment 27 comments |

Story-email Email Printer Print

Comments

Display:

Anna Rawson

Just to add to Anna Rawson. My good friend worked for Sunice (Golf clothing). His marketing strategy was to find the hottest “Non-winners” and get them cheap. If they ever win, you’re set. He met Anna, and said she was the hottest thing he’d ever met. Physically and had a great personality. So.. maybe Barden is not a bad option for the Giants? hahaah If that logic does not work, I give up.

by ross_stephen on Apr 7, 2009 7:30 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

That logic

is fine with me, and I’m with all the Barden fans out there.

by Ed Valentine on Apr 7, 2009 7:38 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Nice post, but

better than Jessica Alba? Impossible!!

by potroast on Apr 7, 2009 7:47 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

LOL!!

Well, everyone has their opinions. Lots of options out there.

by Ed Valentine on Apr 7, 2009 7:50 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Nicks

Jessica Alba is the best…

by gobs56 on Apr 7, 2009 8:54 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Also with Plax and Lindsay

you don’t really know which team either is playing for…..and I wouldn’t touch either of them with a ten foot pole, Plax figuratively, Lindsay literally.

Ed are you also saying Darrius Heyward-Bey never met a camera he didn’t like?

Danica Patrick is ok, doesn’t do a whole lot for me, could be the NASCAR thing.

Jessica Alba is one of God’s finest creations. After he was done putting her together I’ll bet even he said “Me DAMN she is hot!”

Blueshirt Banter: Covering the New York Rangers

Big Blue View: Unofficial New York Giants blog

by Jim Schmiedeberg on Apr 7, 2009 9:27 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

DHB & Reby

I don’t know about the camera thing. I think both would bring you tremendous thrills, but once the excitement wore off I’m not sure they are long-term relationship material.

by Ed Valentine on Apr 7, 2009 9:30 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

ah yes, the age-old man mantra....

some girls are for effing, some are for marrying

Blueshirt Banter: Covering the New York Rangers

Big Blue View: Unofficial New York Giants blog

by Jim Schmiedeberg on Apr 7, 2009 10:48 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

I think

Jessica Alba is for marrying.

by Ed Valentine on Apr 7, 2009 11:40 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

dante stallworth would be another good fit for lindsay lohan

all thier careers seem to be headed in similar trajectories. although only one of them killed a guy.

Also I want Anquan bad now, so can’t we do better than Serena Williams? She not hot, she terrifying. How about Brooklyn Decker. Like Boldin, she is awesome. Also, Q’s got big guns, Brooklyn’s got big ’uns. perfect match!

HELLO HELLO MR WILPON. WE WANT THE MANSION NOT THE CONDO.

by kendynamo on Apr 7, 2009 10:10 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

LOL!!

Rosie is Jeremy Shockey. Broken down, old, ugly and bitter!

by Ed Valentine on Apr 7, 2009 10:20 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

I feel like someone just handed me a pamphlet

that says, “So you just realized that you’re deep in the woods of your offseason….”

Save the neck for me, Clark.

by Mr. Met on Apr 7, 2009 10:48 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

LOL!!

Very true. But, hey, you have to entertain the masses any way you can.

by Ed Valentine on Apr 7, 2009 11:42 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

So I guess Torry Holt

would be Halle Berry?
Are they old? Torry may be pushing it, but his team sucked last year and his production dwarfed the Giants WR. Halle may be 40+ but try telling her that, and by the looks of her I could care less how old she is. They both had some great production in the past, tho the end may be near for both (at least Torry being best in the game and Halle being Top 5).

So while Halle’s not available, Torry is a FA and could be a wise addition for our youngins.

by FreeBradshaw on Apr 7, 2009 10:56 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Holt

I was thinking would be Anna Kournikova … still sexy and desirable, provided you are only thinking short term. You know you’ll be looking for something ‘fresher’ pretty soon.

by Ed Valentine on Apr 7, 2009 11:42 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Anna is nice no doubt, but she really never did anything aside from look good.

Holt was far from a fake. Halle’s gotta fit better cuz she had a nice career.

by FreeBradshaw on Apr 7, 2009 1:44 PM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

mmmmmm....Halle Berry

Blueshirt Banter: Covering the New York Rangers

Big Blue View: Unofficial New York Giants blog

by Jim Schmiedeberg on Apr 7, 2009 3:21 PM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Agree with Halle Berry = Tory Holt

I’d take either. One for 6 days a week, the other for Sunday (Game day). Easy to figure out who….

by ross_stephen on Apr 8, 2009 12:26 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Randy Moss=Angelina Jolie

Completely overrated and while they have some great moments, you’d never wanna stick with them 4 long

by ChuckyofNorris on Apr 8, 2009 4:39 AM EDT reply actions   0 recs

And Randy Moss's

ineptitude in Oakland may have had something to do with him snacking on regular folk’s blood with Al Davis. Jolie liks to sip on the vampire juice too.

by FreeBradshaw on Apr 8, 2009 9:25 AM EDT up reply actions   0 recs

Great job! I think you really nailed Braylon Edwards!

by JasonB on Apr 9, 2009 12:55 PM EDT reply actions   0 recs

Comments For This Post Are Closed


User Tools

Big Blue View is the best independent site on the Internet for year-round news and discussion about the New York Giants.

Community Guidelines
Start posting about the Giants »

Join SB Nation and dive into communities focused on all your favorite teams.

FanPosts

Community blog posts and discussion.

Recommended FanPosts

Fail_small
BBV week 11 pool
Thefalcoholic_small
Ask The Falcoholic!

Recent FanPosts

Header_logo_small
Antonio Pierce Out!!
Small
AP out with neck injury
New_york_giants_logo_small
What are the chances...
Zoo_080_small
hey guys
_1avatar_small
Glimmers of Hope
Small
3-4?
_1avatar_small
Whoah
New_york_giants_9a02_small
Should we be resting Bradshaw?

+ New FanPost All FanPosts >

Latest NFL Headlines from SB Nation

Mobile Live
Eagles shuffle linebackers again
Mobile Live
The VRR: Redskins (3-6) @ Cowboys (6-3)
Mobile Live
Antonio Pierce out indefinitely

SPONSORS

Get Your Giants' Gear


Editor-In-Chief

Bigblueview_small Ed Valentine

Editors

Blueshirt_banter_small Jim Schmiedeberg

Authors

Tyree_believe_small cjmulrain

Moderators

Small brisulph