Bye-bye, Battleship!

by Ed Valentine on Jun 23, 2008 9:39 PM EDT in New York Giants News

The Hefty Lefty is no longer a Giant. Well, he is, actually, he is just no longer a New York Giant.

In a move that has been anticipated since the Giants drafted Kentucky quarterback Andre Woodson, the Giants Monday released backup quarterback Jared Lorenzen.

The 6-foot-4, 275-pound (probably heavier than that) Lorenzen threw only 8 passes and ran two quarterback sneaks in three seasons.

The Giants also waived several other forgettable or unknown players Monday. The only worth being concerned about, though, is Lorenzen.

The Giants won't miss the big fella on the field -- he barely knew where it was, anyway. We will miss him off the field, though.

Hefty Lefty. Battleship Lorenzen. J-Load. I'm sure I'm forgetting some of his nicknames. I think the guy had more of them than any scrub in NFL history.

Picking on David Carr sure as hell isn't going to be as much fun.

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I heard he's going to Miami.

He’s the kind of QB Tuna likes, a real Scott Brunner type. No, seriously, the Pillsbury Throwboy is a Sleeping Giant. When he awakens, the NFL will tremble. Or is it Ireland that’s the Sleeping Giant and the world that will tremble?

by george cronin on Jun 23, 2008 10:28 PM EDT reply actions

We'll miss ya

big guy. You were the most fun backup we’ve had since the guy who was married to the chick on the View and the guy who was the Bachelor.

by cjmulrain on Jun 23, 2008 10:32 PM EDT reply actions

Pillsbury Throw Boy

Is still the best nickname

Lorenzen was a role model for fat tubs of goo everywhere, I raise a jelly donut in his honor this morning!

Giants fan from the womb to the tomb

by Jim Schmiedeberg on Jun 24, 2008 8:05 AM EDT reply actions

My personal favorite

by losangelesmets on Jun 25, 2008 8:20 AM EDT up reply actions

j-load wasnt exactly a mobile QB

instead of shake and bake he had cake and bake.

i guess i will miss him too. i was getting sick of all the jokes when he was providing zero in the way of production. maybe he’ll land on the NY arena league team or something.

by kendynamo on Jun 24, 2008 10:38 AM EDT reply actions

Shoot...

I seriously thought he had potential, if only given a chance.

@ kendynamo – He was not mobile, but what Giants QB has been?

by mrs.jrs1940 on Jun 24, 2008 11:24 AM EDT reply actions

there are statues

more mobile than lorenzen.

by kendynamo on Jun 24, 2008 11:42 AM EDT up reply actions

dunno

I have hard time believing Carr outplayed him

by queler on Jun 24, 2008 11:53 AM EDT reply actions

Carr sucks

We’re in trouble if (God forbid) anything happens to Eli.

I like Woodson’s potential however.

by Cody K on Jun 25, 2008 11:46 AM EDT up reply actions

I liked J-Load’s potential too. I always thought he looked good when I’ve seen him.

by queler on Jun 25, 2008 1:10 PM EDT up reply actions

Agreed, q

I don’t now why they demoted him to third string last year. I’ve never seen anyone throw the long ball so effortlessly. I wanted to see more of him to get a fix on his potential. Oh well, in TC and Reese we trust.

by george cronin on Jun 25, 2008 3:58 PM EDT up reply actions

more nicknames

You can’t forget the round mound of touchdown, the BBQ (Big Beautiful Quarterback), the fatass with the cannon blast.. and ther are a few others

by Hoyadestroya85 on Jun 24, 2008 3:25 PM EDT reply actions

You guys are killin' me here!

Watch me paste this pathetic palooka with a powerful paralyzing perfect pachyderms percussion pitch.

by Mr. Met on Jun 24, 2008 5:06 PM EDT reply actions

I'm a little worried about this move...

Jared knew he wasn’t getting extended time during the game. I’m sure his time on the sidelines was put to good use as an extra brain for Eli. They came into the league together and have been on the same team their entire pro careers. I figured Jared was a lock to remain at least our third QB. Keeping Jared around for Eli while having one another mobile back-up would’ve been enough. Keep Jared for Eli and if you ever need a two yard run and want to distract the line with both Jacobs and the potential QB nonSneak.

Oh well, I hope he ends up with the Redskins some how. He’s a natural Hog. _ Plus the ‘Skins are a friendly divisional rival (at least when they’re not on the field) and I want to see more of him.

by UndrDog on Jun 26, 2008 5:43 AM EDT reply actions